I think you can always tell a good article by how quickly it takes the reader to go and write a similar piece themselves. Having recently applied on-line for the Cath Kidston catalogue I am now bombarded with magazines full of beautiful bits and bobs. Anyway, in the back of the latest magazine was an interview with an artist called Rob Ryan and one of the questions was “People have this idea about romance…” His answer was short and sweet, “To me, romance is seeing an 80-year-old couple…staying together…it’s about the long haul.”
It then took me a grand total of three minutes before I whipped out my laptop and began writing about romance.
Romance. The sheer thought makes me crave roses, chocolate and long country walks and if Jane Austen taught me anything it’s that on occasions getting your petticoat dirty will make Mr. Darcy smile that little bit more.
However, I do think Rob Ryan has a point. I remember walking along Chester river a few years back with an old friend and as we sat on an iron bench and watched the world go by an old couple walked past us arm in arm. My friend then told me his biggest fear was growing old. This seemed so contradictory as there seemed nothing scary about this old couple, two people couldn’t have looked more in love and happy if they tried. This couple summed up what romance was and it appears Rob Ryan saw the same couple.
That is another associating world-wind-word, love. The two are so closely linked it makes it hard to believe that you can have romance without love. I remember many a night when the stars have been out, the world has been silent and it has just been myself and a guy kissing under a full moon. But there was never any love there; even to this day there is no love there, just romantic situations that should have been shared with someone else.
I don’t think it helps that my parents have been together since they were kids, which means my personal expectations of romance are far more imaginary than most peoples. In my mind you find your soul mate, other half, spouse and that’s it, you two are set for life. Obviously there is more than one right person for everyone, or else the only reason these 80-year-old couples are so romantic, will be because they have spent there entire lives looking for each other. But maybe that’s why so many people get divorced?!
There is a quote from a film that says “I think attraction is often mistaken for love” but can’t remember the film…it was clearly a classic. Anyway, I think this quote is true and lust can disguise the obvious and why get involved with the viscous cycle of romance and love when you can save yourself from getting hurt and just play pretend.
Love is everything the world says it is, heart wrenching, hard work and beyond all, will make every emotion in your body go loopy. I fell in love once and he broke my heart, twice.
However, the memory of this old couple is worth a million more heart breaks and there is no reason why romance can’t be present when you’re 21, 30 or 80-years-old.
Until then dream of your prince, riding on his white stallion, ready and waiting to wrap you in his arms and whisk you off into the sunset…
Saturday 18 September 2010
Tuesday 7 September 2010
Mr Men
I have a theory about men. There are two types of them ones who are afraid of life and ones who are afraid of women.
Now is the time to ignore all stereotyping, previous experiences, general beliefs and just go with this idea for the moment…
The first group of men are terrified of the future and anything that involves change. Although they make plans to have a career, own such-an-such a car and live in a particular neighbourhood, chances are they won’t have a mortgage for another 20 years. In fact, they will probably have the same job and life as they did when they were 17 till they’re 70.
However, all is not lost for the non-committal man (as he is guaranteed to be) for he will have the power to seduce any woman who falls within his three meter radius. This may seem like total bliss to a non-changing man, every night a different woman, no strings and nine times out of ten no condom either.
The only real struggle is letting a girl go. Once the woman has made it clear to man number one that she is interested, man has a very tough decision to make-one which will no doubt decrease his brain cells by 50%-getting serious with this woman means potentially making future plans.
And worse yet, this would result in only being with one woman…and man knows that’s not enough, besides it would result in wasting their best asset.
Yes, the life for this one is easy and besides who would want to change it when it’s this good. There is a reason why this man will only use the mirror to do his hair in.
This vanity juxtaposes man number two, who will only look in a mirror accidently and even then never feel satisfied with what he sees. But who cares about physical appearances when there is so much life in the big wide world.
The increasing pessimism of this man means no woman will ever get a look in. If a woman manages to sneak through the net (most likely the girl next door) she better be ready for a relationship governed by rules and regulations and once a month sex (guaranteed to be missionary.)
In hindsight this loving, tender and doting male should not be far off perfect. He will rarely step out of line and apologises like there’s no tomorrow.
However, this is only because he is terrified of women. He has heard about their monthly fits, chocolate obsessions and raging hormones and what is there to like. If it wasn’t for his mother pressurising him to settle down he would still be single.
Plus if he treats his woman like a queen he won’t get on the wrong side of her. Right?
But holding hands aside, man number twos worse trait is his lack of cognition. Every decision made is controlled by his fear not to enrage woman. As a result a simple answer to the question ‘Would you like a cup of tea?’ turns into ‘Don’t worry darling- ill make it for you-don’t you worry pumpkin bottom-I know how you like it-go put Friends on and ill give you a foot massage once I’m back.’
The once man (N.b slightly less manly than man number one) has turned into a mouse. This turn of events ironically ends in woman cheating on man number two with the likes of man number one. Consequently rendering man number two heartbroken and even more afraid of woman and the circle of life continues.
So perhaps there is some stereotyping and generalisations thrown in there and perhaps I have dated too many football captains to know they will always choose legs over brains. But at the end of the day the question is, are men all the same? There’s no correct answer to that one, but what I do know, is that life would be stupidly boring if they were.
Now is the time to ignore all stereotyping, previous experiences, general beliefs and just go with this idea for the moment…
The first group of men are terrified of the future and anything that involves change. Although they make plans to have a career, own such-an-such a car and live in a particular neighbourhood, chances are they won’t have a mortgage for another 20 years. In fact, they will probably have the same job and life as they did when they were 17 till they’re 70.
However, all is not lost for the non-committal man (as he is guaranteed to be) for he will have the power to seduce any woman who falls within his three meter radius. This may seem like total bliss to a non-changing man, every night a different woman, no strings and nine times out of ten no condom either.
The only real struggle is letting a girl go. Once the woman has made it clear to man number one that she is interested, man has a very tough decision to make-one which will no doubt decrease his brain cells by 50%-getting serious with this woman means potentially making future plans.
And worse yet, this would result in only being with one woman…and man knows that’s not enough, besides it would result in wasting their best asset.
Yes, the life for this one is easy and besides who would want to change it when it’s this good. There is a reason why this man will only use the mirror to do his hair in.
This vanity juxtaposes man number two, who will only look in a mirror accidently and even then never feel satisfied with what he sees. But who cares about physical appearances when there is so much life in the big wide world.
The increasing pessimism of this man means no woman will ever get a look in. If a woman manages to sneak through the net (most likely the girl next door) she better be ready for a relationship governed by rules and regulations and once a month sex (guaranteed to be missionary.)
In hindsight this loving, tender and doting male should not be far off perfect. He will rarely step out of line and apologises like there’s no tomorrow.
However, this is only because he is terrified of women. He has heard about their monthly fits, chocolate obsessions and raging hormones and what is there to like. If it wasn’t for his mother pressurising him to settle down he would still be single.
Plus if he treats his woman like a queen he won’t get on the wrong side of her. Right?
But holding hands aside, man number twos worse trait is his lack of cognition. Every decision made is controlled by his fear not to enrage woman. As a result a simple answer to the question ‘Would you like a cup of tea?’ turns into ‘Don’t worry darling- ill make it for you-don’t you worry pumpkin bottom-I know how you like it-go put Friends on and ill give you a foot massage once I’m back.’
The once man (N.b slightly less manly than man number one) has turned into a mouse. This turn of events ironically ends in woman cheating on man number two with the likes of man number one. Consequently rendering man number two heartbroken and even more afraid of woman and the circle of life continues.
So perhaps there is some stereotyping and generalisations thrown in there and perhaps I have dated too many football captains to know they will always choose legs over brains. But at the end of the day the question is, are men all the same? There’s no correct answer to that one, but what I do know, is that life would be stupidly boring if they were.
Saturday 4 September 2010
Saturday night
Today was my first Saturday off in weeks and how did I choose to spend it…tidying the house and watching episode after episode of The Hills. It is official I have no life.
Domestic goddess aside it has been a good day. My parents are away and my brother has been at football all day, leaving me to have the laziest day of pampering and general female-ness. I expected the world of full-time work to be different, but I didn’t expect there to be so little time to keep oneself looking female.
So once the eyebrows had been tackled, nails buffed and legs stripped of about three layers of skin, I was back to my female self again. Men have it so easy it is unfair; they simply roll out of bed and put on the nearest (and cleanest) clothes.
Talking of men…apparently there are some nice ones out there. Enough said (she smiles.)
Domestic goddess aside it has been a good day. My parents are away and my brother has been at football all day, leaving me to have the laziest day of pampering and general female-ness. I expected the world of full-time work to be different, but I didn’t expect there to be so little time to keep oneself looking female.
So once the eyebrows had been tackled, nails buffed and legs stripped of about three layers of skin, I was back to my female self again. Men have it so easy it is unfair; they simply roll out of bed and put on the nearest (and cleanest) clothes.
Talking of men…apparently there are some nice ones out there. Enough said (she smiles.)
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