Everyone has their secrets and nine times out of ten there’s a genuinely good reason for them. I guess you could say it’s what makes an individual individual and that can never be a bad thing.
However, this week my secret took its toll on what could potentially be the most amazing job ever.
Since I first discovered writing and men I have wanted to write for Cosmo magazine. I don’t know what it is about the male species, but for some reason when they are the topic I can write essays. So imagine the excitement, jumping up and down and general astonishment when I received a phone call from Cosmo offering me a month’s work experience with them starting this week…and then imagine the heart-break and anguish when I had to refuse the offer.
My general lack of intelligence had just blown a pretty huge opportunity and no amount of male experiences or ability to write was going to change that.
I had always thought honesty was easy, in male terms good guys are honest and bad ones get caught cheating. But when it comes to being honest with yourself it’s a whole other ball game. Your self esteem will instantly plummet; you’ll get sick of ‘encouraging’ comments and really wish you could re-write the past.
Sadly re-writing the past is a slight impossibility and no amount of chocolate will make it better. Besides you will just end up fat and let’s face it, no one wants to be a fat ugly journalist.
So it seems the dream job will have to hang on for a few months, while something a bit more important takes priority.
At this rate I will be paying somebody to write this essay for me, the real reason for having to turn Cosmo down, before anyone gets ideas about my unnamed love child…which by the way will either be called Hitler or Chardonnay.
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